Friendship, such a complex word.  

Abstract yet loaded with expectation 

I’ve wrestled through decades of trials and often gave up in despairing resignation. 

 

A tug of war as I tried to navigate 

through jealousy, love, conflict and resentment 

In need of care, kindness, connection, I messed up often  

pulling, pushing, shutting out until finally finding contentment. 

 

Because friendship is not about equal measures,  

responsibility for one another’s happiness,  

it’s not about giving and taking and counting pleasures 

or keeping score, more frequently, lamenting your unhappiness. 

 

Throughout the years, I’ve learned many lessons  

how to love, how to trust, how to release my pain 

I’ve severed many bonds that caused hurt and never gain.  

 

And even though I’m not counting, I can’t resist but note 

these precious few who I call friends, who taught me more than most 

what friendship means, how it’s birthed and how it grows  

like pains of labour, the joy of birth, the milestones that we reach,  

the falls and sobs, tantrums  

and calls to be picked up and nurtured foremost. 

 

In those times we are alone, figuring things out, falling down and getting up 

But those around us who through love, lend a helping hand,  

a little support, a little encouragement, sometimes just their presence 

In silence the loudest words are spoken 

And what is left is just the essence 

Like distilling the finest spirit 

Drop by drop of pure indulgence 

It is worth waiting for, to gain 

the joy of sheer abundance 

 

Treasure to be stored in the storehouse of our hearts 

Those precious few we get to call friends, 

Who touch our inner sacred parts 

deep where no one sees 

where only we can go 

 

that’s where those precious friendships live 

for no one else to know 

like valuable jewels kept secret 

sparkling no matter how long 

years, decades or lifetimes,  

they continue shining on 

 

I consider myself blessed 

to count on just one hand 

those few I call true friends 

stored in my soul’s treasure chest 

and you my sweet delight 

are certainly one 

 

for whose friendship I shall forever be grateful 

for all that we have shared 

for your silent and gentle presence 

your love and encouragement when I have despaired 

 

For I know that even though I cannot compete and match your generous heart, 

It matters not to you for you do not count in the ways of man 

But feel and know that the bond connecting us 

Is created over the years of weaving this embroidery like a fine piece of art 

 

We call it friendship and I wish there was another word 

that could describe truly what it is 

but then it would become yet another entry 

defined in some medical dictionary like a disease 

 

No, it is so much more than that 

finer than a piece of exquisite art 

and more precious than the most expensive jewel 

and undefined I will leave it 

for your soul to carve its own craft 

but know that our friendship means so much to me 

and you will always live in my heart 

 

Michelle Foulia 

2/3/22